Of the 65 songs on her discography, starting from her debut single “Apartment No. 9” in 1966, one will forever be affixed to Tammy Wynette’s name: “Stand by Your Man.”
The track, co-written by Wynette with music producer Billy Sherill, was released as the first single and title track of her same-titled 1968 album. At the time, she had numerous chart-toppers, including “Your Good Girl’s Gonna Go Bad” and “I Don’t Wanna Play House.” But this song truly cemented her name in the genre and solidified her status as one of the country music queens on par with Loretta Lynn and Dolly Parton. She had become a bonafide country superstar.
That is, it wasn’t just a country number one. It also crossed over to pop and peaked at number 19. Aside from chart success, the song earned Wynette her second Grammy for Best Country Vocal Performance, Female. In 1999, the song was inducted into the Grammy Hall of Fame.
Whilst celebrated for its thought-provoking lyrics, it was also the topic of controversy.
Meaning Behind the Song
The song opens with the line, “Sometimes it’s hard to be a woman.” And it undoubtedly and firmly struck a chord with her female listeners, especially in 1968. As Karen Heller from The Washington Post wrote, that year was “the moment when women took the message and the movement out of their homes and onto the streets.” A quick history lesson: The 1960s marked big cultural changes in American society, including the women’s movement or the so-called second wave of feminism, which emerged later in the decade.
But the controversy hit in the chorus: “But if you love him, you’ll forgive him.” To many, it was a step back from what women had been fighting for at the time.
In her autobiography, Wynette shared her thoughts about this. She wrote, “I don’t see anything in that song that implies a woman is supposed to sit home and raise babies while a man goes out and raises hell… To me it means: be supportive of your man; show him you love him and you’re proud of him; and be willing to forgive him if he doesn’t always live up to your image of what he should be.”And as her co-author noted, it was simply a song saying “I love you” without reservations.
It would’ve been a career-ending song for many, considering the negative attention it received, but Wynette’s performance was of a different caliber. It was powerful and passionate — almost theatrical — and, at the same time, yearning. Hence, the song remained a popular piece of country music, becoming a favorite song by artists to cover. After that, 20 more Tammy Wynette songs became country hits.
Catch Tammy Wynette’s classic track “Stand by Your Man” in the video below.